Presence over personality

My friend Jim knows a stunning amount of super famous people. 

Like, really knows them. 

Major celebrities, business moguls, even presidents. 

He told me something about Bill Clinton once that really struck me. 

He said, “He has an amazing presence because he’s amazingly present.”

You know, that whole “makes you feel like you’re the only person in the room,” level of presence. 

The thing about that kind of presence is, it can’t be faked. 

Nor should anyone attempt to fake it. 

To me, having someone’s false attention is more insulting than them looking over my shoulder for someone more important, or interesting, to talk to. 

Because, at least then I know what they’re about. 

So…

If you’re a shy freelancer, this should come as a relief.

It’s so easy, through the lens of social media, to see our space as a personality contest. 

It isn’t. 

Honesty, I think we have the opposite problem…

Copywriters using “personality” as a crutch. 

For instance…

There are a number of freelancers who’ve somehow found their way into my newsfeed, and every time I see their posts, I’m like…

What the Fk are you doing?!

Grown-ass people, who I assume are good at their work, posting reel after reel of pure ridiculousness.

Here’s me dancing crazy to a Taylor Swift song… 

Here’s me doing a wall squat above my sleeping dog…

Here’s me lip synching to a “trending” audio (even though that stopped being funny 3 years ago)…

Every friggin’ day.

I know… you’re like, “Kev, you just can unfollow them!”

And I typically do. But a few of them, I can’t help but wince-watch because it’s just so stunningly embarrassing that I’ve moved past annoyed and into fascinated. 

I need to understand WHY?!

I mean, posting goofy stuff is okay ONCE IN A WHILE.

Yes, be real. Use your personality, show some vulnerability. 

But, when you do it e-v-e-r-y d-a-y, and you’re not 13 years old, it just comes off… desperate. 

Like, should someone considering hiring you for a project pop onto your account, see five videos of you dancing to YMCA – dressed as every character in The Village People – and think, “Oh yes. I’m in good hands.”

No.

They’re going to think, “Oh damn! Good thing I checked first. I think I’ll hire that shy writer who seems really dependable.”

Point is this… 

Be who you are – all the way. 

If you’ve been forcing yourself to “post on IG” all year because someone told you it will make you “relevant”… but you still have 78 followers and get an average of two likes per post… and you feel silly about it…

Stop doing that!

That’s not your channel, and that’s perfectly fine. 

Find a platform where you feel comfortable being you and thrive there. 

Take a guy like Daniel Throssell…

He’s dominating the email guru game, earning a great income, and having the time of his life… with ZERO social media presence!

I asked him why he doesn’t use it. 

Know what he said?

“I just absolutely do not enjoy it.”

Let’s bask in the glory of such clarity for one second here. 

Daniel is an incredible entertainer. He could undoubtedly leverage social media to create a much bigger audience for himself.

I’m sure most “business consultants” would tell him he’s crazy for passing that up. 

But… he… “absolutely does not enjoy it,”

So, instead, he pours every ounce of his energy into email, because that is what he enjoys. 

He has an incredible presence because he is incredibly present where it matters most. 

And so, the people come to him. 

Now, if you’re thinking, “But Kev, you just said it isn’t a personality contest, but Throssell writes with a LOT of personality…”

I say to you, “Exactly!”

He WRITES with it. 

If you’re looking to make your bones as a writer and you can’t write in a voice people are compelled to read… you are in the wrong business. 

I’m assuming that’s NOT the case for you (but if it is, start writing more! And develop the ability to write in dynamic voices, otherwise the bots WILL destroy you!).

So, choose your channel. 

If you like video, start a YouTube channel. 

If you hate video, post articles on LinkedIn, or Medium, or wherever else you see fit. 

My best social channel is Facebook. 

Know which kinds of posts of mine get the biggest reaction there?

These Sunday emails.

Copy and paste. 

Just do your best work, the way only you can, and put it in front of the people who need to see it. 

Don’t force it. 

Be present.

You got this.